I'm busy working on my blog posts. Watch this space!
A word on grief
April 27, 2017
When I was 10, my grandfather died. At the visitation, I had a complete meltdown. I was whisked away to another room and told (not by my mom or dad) to stop acting out and that I was upsetting everyone. I understand now that my grief was unrecognized and therefore not valid. It was unrecognized because everyone else was grieving. Now I am grown and I have lost my firstborn child. For 10 years he was my only child. For half of his life he was my only reason for living. I feel my grief is overwhelming at times, then manageable at others. Please read this article whether you are grieving or someone you love is grieving. Also read the related article 'Children and Grief.' Children who lose a loved one grieve, too. They need to be allowed to experience it so that when they are adults, they will have good coping skills. One of the greatest gifts we can give to each other, besides love and kindness, is the knowledge of experience. Sometimes people need to experience things for themselves and sometimes they need direction.
The article talks about putting mementos in the casket...we did. The kids made him going away cards, I wrote him a letter, put in a Rosary card and a box of chocolates, at his dad's request, and crossed his forehead, at his stepmother's request. It really helped me. At first I was very afraid to think that I was actually going to do all of that. I felt way out of my comfort zone. But then again, the whole experience was/is way out of my comfort zone. #doitforshelby